Ameya: An unlikely subject for a blog post

Ameya Sinha is not Santa Claus. The real Santa wouldn't pressure me to write a post about him. But Ameya would. And Ameya did.

I associate Ameya with a lot of things. But most notably, with his style of texting - one which I approve of. His messages are long, neat, punctuated, and meaningful - just the way I like them. But when I am not receiving texts from Ameya (which I don't these days...take a hint, Ameya!) I read his status messages. They are witty and plagiarised.

He helped me out a lot with my SAT but still, coercing me to write this blog post about him is unacceptable. Ameya is one of your super-confident-bordering-on-cocky and upbeat people. He can shoot the breeze with strangers and charm them into doing his Environment Education project (part of it, at least). When you are around Ameya, there's never a dull moment. That might make him sound like a skin-brightening face cleanser, but that's Ameya. He does wonders for girls' complexions. Maybe he is a Santa Claus after all.

Teething Troubles

Yesterday, post midnight, I sat discussing the praying mantis with my friend. What sets the praying mantis apart from its other insect buddies is that the female praying mantis, after mating with the male, bites off his head. Feminists should make the praying mantis their poster girl. Who else embodies their aspirations so perfectly?
But if the mantis isn't floating their boat, they could have a look at the protagonist of the movie Teeth, who turns her vulnerability as a sexual prey into a weapon of, shall we say, mass destruction?
This post will proceed to review a movie more ridiculous than Twilight [yes, something is indeed more preposterous than it]. So, let's sink our teeth into the movie.

The Teeth is about a girl who has - wait for it - teeth in her vagina. She has teeth in her mouth, too, by the way. But let's not digress. So, the teeth which do not belong where they are perform the function of a pepper spray for the girl, albeit at a much later stage. She uses it to: bite off the finger of a perverted male gynaecologist; bite the apparatus of a boyfriend who forced himself upon her; bite off the equipment [do we see a pattern here?] of her degenerate stepbrother and release it on the ground for her dog to devour [ummmm, it must have been lip-smackingly delicious]. I hope she didn't bite off more than she could chew.

This movie is so bizarre that it is actually entertaining, in a droll fashion. But I was left with one question at the end of it: did she brush her teeth twice daily? Because it is just so important to